My ideal final meal

My ideal final meal

Whilst I have absolutely no intention of dying any time soon, last night in a drunken sleepless stupor I was considering as to what my ideal meal would entail.

It made me think of death row inmates who (apparently) are allowed to have absolutely anything that they want as a final meal prior to being killed.

There is a website specifically dedicated to this here. There are also a number of newspaper articles about the topic including this one from the Telegraph.

Whilst I have never done anything remotely bad.. certainly not worthy of execution, it is always pragmatic to be prepared. If anything happens in my life that means I need a 'last meal', I want it to include the following:

N.B. Photos have been included to make you hungry and make you aware of what each thing is. Some people for example are not aware of Watermelons.

  • Rib eye steak. 24oz. Medium rare. 1140 calories.

nOMG I love steak. Must be Rib Eye!

  • Watermelon. Half. Cut into squares. 680 calories.

This is watermelon

  • Kallo Corn Cakes. 4 cakes. 100 calories.

These are like cakes of popcorn

  • Aldi 'lighter' cream cheese. 100g. 25g per corn cake (see above). 148 calories.

Its slightly tart but blooming amazing

  • Oppo. 250ml of each of the three flavours. 570 calories.

So so good. Slightly less sugar than normal ice cream. No less tasty.

  • Fresh Bakery (a place in Leeds) half rotisserie chicken in garlic naan bread. 1200 calories.

Perfection. Hand baked Naan and awesome chicken.

  • Pitza Cano (pizza takeaway in Leeds) Meat Calzone. 2000 calories.

Not as good as you feel like they are whilst eating them..

  • Lucky Charms. Large family sized box. With milk. 1700 calories + 500 for milk.

Cereal. Wow. Marshmallows. Wow.

  • Twinkies. 2. 300 calories.

Add extra double cream.

  • Tawny Port. 250 ml. 400 calories.

The spirit that is not a spirit.. and tastes great.

  • Chip shop chips. Large portion. 2000 calories.

Fat. Grease. Yes.

  • McFlurry. 1. 406 calories.

There is something about McFlurry Ice cream

  • McDonalds Vanilla Milkshake. Large. 820 calories.
    My go to sugar hit.

Total

As you will have surely noticed.. I did not want to be greedy, and as such would only request a half rotisserie chicken and a lowly two Twinkies. That means that my final meal would in fact be rather nutritious.

Total: 11,964 calories. Assuming a 2,000 calorie daily burn.. and assuming that on my last day alive I probably wouldn't be doing much training/physical exercise, I would have a calorie excess of 9,964 calories. That means that on my final day I would put on 2.85 pounds. Oh shit !

It would be worth it.

Anything obvious that I have missed? What would you eat on your final day?


Thomas Clowes

Thomas Clowes

I am a 28 year old software engineer from the United Kingdom. During the day I build multi platform applications. In my spare time I eat food and run marathons. Sometimes I write angry tweets.